cats

[gunner]

So I bought some tomato seeds, got them planted and they sprouted, and were looking beautiful. Healthy little buggers, standing tall in their little warm starting trays. I get home yesterday and the top was off the starter trays, dirt everywhere, and all my little sprouts gone.

The cats, I dont know which one my wife has three of the fuckers, got the top off, and ate my little plants. Of course it is my fault for not putting them somewhere else, even though there is no where else that the bastards cant get into. Oh well my wife loves them, I love her, but if anything ever happened to her, out comes the cages and to the pound they go. If no one would take them, add bricks to the cages and throw them in the river. No I wouldnt and couldnt, but dammit, why?

To add insult to injury now with my wife being pregnant I have to clean the cats crap box. So now I will have to clean the poop that contains my little tomato plants, ugh. Give me dogs anyday.

[Dragonfire]

Cats, the other white meat!

My favorite kitty is in a bag being chucked off a bridge, J/K or am I? :P

[mojo]

Never had a cat and never will.

Dogs only my house.








Since no one else has said it i guess i will.

I do love me some pussies. :)




mojo

[Yo Mama]

Gunner, man, get one of THESE (http://www.omegapaw.com/RollnCleanLrg.html).

It's made cleaning the cat crapper almost pleasant. No more scooping.

The only place I could find was was at http://www.petco.com -- Petco doesn't even carry them in-store.

Trust me, you will not regret it if you purchase this item. I clean my box twice a day now, it's that painless.

[gunner]

We tried one of those boxes, but one of the cats wouldnt go in it and was pooping and pissing on the side of the litter box. We have one of those littermaid automatic deals, it works pretty good, but I still hate cleaning up after the fuckers.

[Yo Mama]

That sucks pretty bad -- both my cats took to that box like a duck to water. It's easier for them to go potty without the toddler harassing them. :lol:

[gunner]

The one that wouldnt go in it is like thirty pounds, honestly the biggest cat I have ever seen. I dont think she could fit in there to be honest. I dislike cats, but I kind of like that one, she harrases the other cats, and she is fat. She isnt the one that ate my mater plants it was my wifes "baby" that I cant stand. She is into everything all the time, and she fucking hates me. Everytime I try and pet her she bites me, they are declawed so she cant scratch, but she bites, hard. That is the one I would like to throw off a bridge in a sack

[Yo Mama]

I saw one on TV that has "washable" "reusable" kitty litter. It actually looked both scary, and too small for a cat potty. The machine washes and dries the litter automatically.

If I see the commercial again, I'll post their website.

[gunner]

I saw that also, one of those oh i dont need to write it down I will remember it. Yeah, uh huh.

I think that would probably scare the shit out of the cats.

[Yo Mama]

I think that would probably scare the shit out of the cats.

Isn't that the point? :lol:

I found it: http://www.catgenie.com/

[Yo Mama]

Holy shit! (Pun intended)

They're either $300 or $360.

Daaaaamn.

[gunner]

yeah scratch that idea, I am not paying that much money for those fuckers. I will just grin and bear it, and clean the bastards poop.

Completely unrelated, but does anyone know a natural poison, something that woudl kill a small animal without really pointing to "poisoning" as the cause of death?

[vckums]

Bad Gunner! However should you happen to go outside and leave the door open.....

[gunner]

Yeah that happened once, I left the door to the garage open when I ran to the hardware store. Opened the door and we have one cat that is batshit fucking crazy, I mean she runs from her own shadow. We have three fucking cats, why do we need three fucking cats? Three goddamn cats, and three goddamn dogs, one kid and another on the way, no wonder I am angry all the time.

Anyway, the crazy cat, crazy baisy is her name is out there going meowwww, just all nutty crazy sounding. I was like oh shit, I am in big trouble if this cat bolts, I got down on my hands and knees and said really soft, baisy, come here kitty. Instead of coming to me she starts running into the screen door to try and get back inside, looking back it was freaking hilarious. She couldnt get in so she headed for the outside I tried to grab her, nope, she was gone out into world. My wife cried for like two nights because of it, then finally the stupid cat came back, they always come back.

The other two cats just go out side and eat grass then come right back in.

[Martian Exile]

You think you have problems, two years ago I bought a big old historic antebellum house, and because I had to work out of state to pay for the bloody thing, I moved my sister in to watch the place. She moved in TEN of the stinking psycho allergy factories. I guess she must have got a A+ in “how to destroy a 216 year old house 1-0-1”. I couldn’t get the smell out if I burned the joint down. I would have been better off letting the resident ghost take care of the place.

[mojo]

yeah scratch that idea, I am not paying that much money for those fuckers. I will just grin and bear it, and clean the bastards poop.

Completely unrelated, but does anyone know a natural poison, something that woudl kill a small animal without really pointing to "poisoning" as the cause of death?



LSD.



It may not kill em outright but they'll probably skydive off a tall building thinking there a flying fox.

[Yo Mama]

Mmmm, probably not.

'Way back in the 80's when I was just embarking on a path of self-discovery and better living through chemistry, a BF took me to the Oakland Coliseum to hang out in the parking lot and party during a Grateful Dead show. We didn't have tickets, didn't want to see the concert; his goal was trading beers for hits of LSD. We took six cases of beer, a bunch of ice, and set up shop between a restaurant-cum-bus and a psychedelic VW bug.

Let's just say that the bartering went very very well. It was my first time trying LSD and I ended up taking three hits. I handled it all evening.

We got home somehow -- he'd taken like 16 doses and still managed to drive us back to SF -- and settled down to have a fun trip. My cat at the time, a pound rescue, came to sit with us and was licking my fingers.

Turned out he absorbed some from my fingertips and he spent the evening sitting in the living room window watching the traffic go by. When it came on, he was rolling around, carrying on like a kitten in the catnip.

Didn't do him any harm, and he didn't do anything nutso, just sat in the window watching the cars go by.

He did seem to be a bit "more" than a cat afterwards. Maybe it woke up his consciousness like some suggest psychedelic use awakened our own ancestors' consciousness thousands of years ago.

[Bitchkoma]

yeah scratch that idea, I am not paying that much money for those fuckers. I will just grin and bear it, and clean the bastards poop.

Completely unrelated, but does anyone know a natural poison, something that woudl kill a small animal without really pointing to "poisoning" as the cause of death?



LSD.



It may not kill em outright but they'll probably skydive off a tall building thinking there a flying fox.

What the fuck, man? Why waste a good tab giving a cat a trip?

Tell you what. You take the tab yourself and toss the cat into a bunch of flowering lilies.

Yes, it will lead to death. Ugly, painful death via poisoning.

Cat owners warned over killer flowers (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2005/05/06/nlilly06.xml&sSheet=/news/2005/05/06/ixhome.html)

A national alert has been issued to pet owners after pollen from a bunch of supermarket flowers killed a cat.

When John Hartnett bought his wife oriental stargazer lilies, he was unaware that he was passing a death sentence on the family's 13-year-old Siamese, Catalina.

The cat brushed against the flowers then licked the pollen from its fur. Within minutes she started being sick and, within hours, had died after going blind, suffering renal failure and becoming virtually paralysed.

The above is not intended for assassinations. It's for cat owners to know so their cat can avoid that sort of fate.

[Yo Mama]

There are a whole bunch of plants you should keep your cats away from. I had heard about the stargazers before -- they're such pretty flowers but I won't have them in my house.

[Bitchkoma]

Apparently all lilies are poisonous to cats.

[gunner]

I talk tough, but man reading about that poor cat that got pollen on its fur. I couldnt do anything to the cats, I am too much of a softy, cant extinguish a life just because they make me have to do one or two more chores.

That and my wife loves her kitties and I cant do anything that would ever hurt her.

[Bitchkoma]

I figured as much, hence why I wasn't worried about posting that info. Plus the fact that it's out there and somewhat public knowledge anyways.

At any rate I doubt there are any psychopaths on this site. Maybe crazy loons, but not twisted evil fuckers.

[gunner]

Well I can confirm that I am a crazy loon, but Iam not twisted evil fucker. I dont think anyhow, If I were crazy I wouldnt know I was crazy, so I could be I guess.

Probably not, unless you count tying hookers up in closets, and pulling wings off flies evil.

[Yo Mama]

Correction, there are one, perhaps two twisted evil fuckers on site, but they are only spying. Tony, Amy, I mean you. :P

[skunk]

I think that would probably scare the shit out of the cats.

Isn't that the point? :lol:

I found it: http://www.catgenie.com/

That is insane. No way would I buy my cat a toilet. She's spoiled enough as it is.

I honestly did not like cats at all before I found one that didn't attack me if I tried petting it. That's the way to go. Find an animal that doesn't attack, and you're all good. Go figure, right?

[skunk]

Probably not, unless you count tying hookers up in closets, and pulling wings off flies evil.

What does your wife think about the hooker nonsense?