What Pissed You Off Today?

[Yo Mama]

For me it was the woman who cut me off going around the lake, not using her turn signal, on the phone.

Hey, stupid, I'm driving an SUV and you're driving a car that looks like it runs on four hamsters and a Cheeto, so I'd be careful about squeezing in gaps with less than a couple of feet clearance.

[Firestar]

One of my other favorite sites has been having server issues and I haven't been able to log in all weekend.
That and my EX keeps pissing me off.
Fucktard.

[Yo Mama]

That and my EX keeps pissing me off.
Fucktard.

That makes two of us. Though my asshat has been lying low lately. I'm sure he's planning something extra speshul. :roll:

[vckums]

I still have my resentment towards Sears LOL Other then that nothing yet. I got flowers for my yard and vegetable plants for my garden.

[Yo Mama]

Goose Shit

We have a lake in the middle of the city, Lake Merritt. It has a bird sanctuary and a couple of decent playgrounds.

The problem is the fucking geese. Canadian geese. There is a resident population that lives here year round now -- they're too fat and lazy to even migrate anymore.

Every spring there are hordes of goslings. Great big flocks of honking, shitting geese. They walk in the road and you have to be careful not to run over them. The weird thing is that the population of adults doesn't ever seem to increase by that much, it stays pretty much the same size. So either feral cats are getting them, or they're being whacked by cars or caught and roasted by crackheads.

The big problem is their shit. Have you ever seen goose poop? It's dark green, and solid, and about the size of a housecat turd. 3 to 4 inches long and pretty big in diameter. They shit EVERYWHERE.

There are places in the park that you can barely see the grass there is so much goose shit.

I took my son to the park this morning and he wanted to chase the geese, which is quite funny to watch as they are almost as big as he is and they waddle just fast enough to stay ahead of him, while he shrieks and laughs and runs along behind.

But OMFGBBQ so much goose shit everywhere! It's gross! The grass is nice and green, true, but seriously, somebody needs to catch all the damn geese and put a cork in them.

[gunner]

Yeah I think those stupid things are everywhere throughout the damn country. We used to have a lot of them up there in grass valley. There are a ton of them back here in Indiana also, I think what they do is shake the eggs or something though so they dont hatch. If they break them they will just lay more, but if they lay shake them or whatever they do and keep them in tact the geese will keep incubating them. They probably do something like that out there also, although they would have to do it during the cover of night so the liberals wouldnt cry about that.

Their shit is huge, I do my part back here during hunting season by shooting as many of them as I can. They are pretty good eating, so at least they are good for something.

[vckums]

GN get some urban cammoflauge on and reduce their population LMAO

[Firestar]

General..they do the same to the parks up here in Canada..of course.
I found that out taking my kids to a park out of town they had not seen since we moved away five years ago. There was easily 50-60 geese and shit everywhere. My kids could not play there and we were all very sad, because they had such happy memories of that park.
As for depleting the numbers..it is illegal to hunt them here in Canada..they are protected.
Not sure about where you are.

[Iamsix]

Over grown rodents is all that Canadien geese are. I hate those bastards.

[vckums]

Benji's teacher! She will mention the school fundraiser @ Chuck E Chees for a fucking full week infront of the kids but will only give us a 1 day notice for dress up day. And it has to be a book character(before a movie was out so that kills a lot of ideas I came up with). WTF man...so me and every parent in that school will be out looking for crap in the same city!

Im bringing the stun gun tomorrow

[Iori Komei]

Wilcox chocolate milk.
It's so damned tasty, but I feel like a beached whale after a single small glass of it.

[Yo Mama]

Clarinex D

So my doc puts me on this prescription strength antihistamine. It's making me feel so much better. One a day keeps the lung snails away, and all that.

But since I started taking it, I've had insomnia.

The onset of the insomnia exactly correlates to my starting the Clarinex.

So this morning I go online to look for "clarinex + insomnia" and find that it affects about 1% of patients taking it. The websites all say that since so few people have this side effect it is unclear whether or not it is from the Clarinex.

Well, pharmaceutical vampires, the insomnia IS from the Clarinex. I don't suffer from insomnia -- I'm so tired by the end of the day I usually pass out on the couch in front of the TV.

I'm sick of lying in bed for hours sort of half out of it waiting to go all the way to sleep. So last night I took an Ativan for the first time in months.

I slept. But then I had a real hard time getting out of bed.

Sigh. Can't win for losing.

[vckums]

Is it a timed release pill? If not ask DR if you can take 1/2. You could also try taking it earlier.

[Yo Mama]

I take it about 8 am and still can't sleep by the end of the day.

I still have plenty of Ativan, and the Monterey Kush, so I'll be OK.

Hopefully once the mulberries stop blooming I'll be over the worst of it. Never had spring allergies before -- it's really bad pollen this year.

[vckums]

CRAMPS SUCK....Might be TMI but tough shit it's my rant of the day.

[Firestar]

Too many bills..too much month left at the end of the money.

[Grand]

Baaaahh!!!

The cry of universal verbal crap.

[JiveTurkey]

Too many bills..too much month left at the end of the money.


VERY well said.

[Yo Mama]

Here's what pissed me off yesterday -- today is too new yet, but just give it time.

Jaywalkers and wanderers.

There is a perfectly good sidewalk alongside the road, and yet a certain class of society in Oakland tends to walk up the middle of the fucking street instead, and then look at you like YOU'RE nuts when you honk at them for standing in your right of way.

What pisses me off is that you aren't allowed to naturally select for intelligence by removing the morons from the gene pool.

Is it because they're stupid, or because they know that if you hit them they can sue you for everything you and your insurance company have, so they don't care if they're risking quadripelegia?

[vckums]

That select few has some stranglers out here in my city that do the same thing. Did ya drvie right up on thier asses? I do now. If you're in the middle of the road you are in the wrong. Pedestrian in the street, that's a no no. Middle of the street isn't a crosswalk, that rule don't apply.

California VC 21954. (a) Every pedestrian upon a roadway at any point other thanwithin a marked crosswalk or within an unmarked crosswalk at anintersection shall yield the right-of-way to all vehicles upon the roadway so near as to constitute an immediate hazard.

[gunner]

What pissed me off last night, is my wife. I have forgotten what a joy it is to live with someone that is pregnant. I love her but what a bitch. I was teasing the dog last night, we have a blind dog and it is fun to tease her with her biscuit at night. Wave it in front of her face, she can smell it but cant see it and just starts snapping at the air, it makes me laugh. Last night I did that, I do it all the time, it amuses me, but last night my wife yells at me. I dont mean just a little yelling I mean the top of her lungs YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE STOP TEASING MY DOG!!!! So I gave the dog her biscuit petted her a little while like I do everynight, (the dog loves me, like the sun sets and rises with me kind of love) then jesus will you leave the dog alone let her sleep.

Then I got in bed, was laying there and she started picking a fight with me, you need to clean the garage this weekend, ok honey. Do I need to write it down, cause you wont remember you never do. I ask you to do something and it is always, oh I forgot, and it never gets done then I have to do it, and I cant do it I am sick. Why cant you just do what I ask you? On and on it went, yes dear I would answer, then there was more crap from her. Finally I said you are being crazy, then the crying started, I am sorry I cant help it. Pregnant women, now even crazier then normal!!

[vckums]

Rub her butt Gunner!!!!

[gunner]

The only thing that I am doing to her butt is kicking it if she doesnt straighten up and fly right. She was in such rare form she would have hit me thinking I was trying to shag her.

[vckums]

I'm telling ya it works on preggo chicks.

Better make up a bed in the spare room lol

[gunner]

I tried to take your advice and gave her a little ass rub. I got punched in the stomach and asked, "what the fuck I was doing". I tried to tell her I thought maybe that would help, although I didnt really want to go in to detail about where I heard it. In her current state telling her, "some women online told me to do that", probably wasnt a good choice. So thanks for the advice but it turned out like I thought it would, she is crazy as hell right now. She had a complete and total meltdown last night because she is sick and she thought she was going to run out of kleenex. We had two boxes, but I had to run to the store and pick more up.

Yeah, I slept in the spare bedroom last night, so yeah. THANKS vckums!!

[vckums]

Aww hell I'm sorry Gunner. I was only trying to help. :cry:

[gunner]

Thanks for trying to help, I am all healed up now from the beating she gave me. I got back at her by getting her favorite ice cream and eating all but a spoonful of it. I got a severe stomach ache and almost crapped my pants, but it was worth it.

I do appreciate your suggestions, but like I said my wife is meaner then the average women. :lol:

I am sure I will have to hit you ladies up for more suggestions, I didnt learn anything the first time she was pregnant. I guess that goes back to the discussion in the movie forum about not listening and stuff?

[Yo Mama]

Got it in one!

Damn, dude, you crack me the fuck up.

[Yo Mama]

So I'm getting home with my son after playing in the park, and I'm getting out of my car in the secure parking lot of my building. I'm leaving my son in for a second as I dash to the compactor across the lot to throw away some trash.

Some nasty street rat is at my gate, saying, "Miss? Miss? Come here!"

I'm like, "I ain't coming there, what the hell do you want?"

"Uh... my car ran out of gas on the freeway (right) and I need a little help."

"I ain't giving you anything; I got two small kids to raise on a fixed income."

"oh, well, god bless you then."

Like a red flag to a bull. I HATE that passive-aggressive guilt trip they try to lay on you with their god bullshit. Oh, you didn't give me any money so I can go get a rock then go home and slap my ho around, but god loves you anyway (subtext: you'll burn in hell for not paying for my rock).

So, of course, I bellow, "Spare me the god shit."

"Oh, you a atheist bitch, huh?"

"Yeah, and I don't give money to fucking crackheads. Now get off this private property before I call 911." By then I'm inside the shed where the compactor is. He throws his soda over the fence and it splats in the driveway.

He gets moving while I get my kid out of the car and go in.

I absofuckinglutely hate that "god loves you" crap the crackheads spew when they are trying to guilt you out for not getting them high.

Dude, if you really were broke down on the freeway, what the hell are you doing all the way over at my house? Call a family member or friend to come get you, because I'm not buying your story.

Sheesh.

[Martian Exile]

Next time tell them that if God realy loved them, He would not have turned them into a fuck up!

[Yo Mama]

Excellent come back! That, or, if god loves you so much, why did you run out of gas? :lol:

[Foxtrot Oscar]

Mosquitoes pissed me off with bells on today.

They ate my toes...

... 7 of them have freaking bites on.

The little bastards.

Fox

[Yo Mama]

I'm allergic to them and to flea bites. That's why I don't live in the tropics. :lol:

[watcher]

Gunner I feel for ya man.
I've been down that road +3

You could always tea-bag her.
She may find it relaxing. Does she sleep with her mouth open?

[Yo Mama]

From the "do I really look that stupid to you?" department:

I just got back from the grocery store, having to get a few supplies. I had just finished putting the bags in the car and was about to put my son in his car seat. As I turned to get him, I see someone on the make, sizing me up as a mark. Live in the ghetto long enough and you only need one look to know what's coming. I turned away quickly and started unbuckling my son.

She starts in behind me. "Excuse me?" I ignore her. Get the hint.

Nope. No good. "Excuse me, miss?" Still ignoring her. The buckle on the cart is one of the new ones that take an extra push on a button to get unclipped. It's giving me a hard time. I'm just keeping my back turned and working on my shit.

"Miss? Miss! I don't mean to bother you ..." yes you fucking do, or you'd get the hint and STFU. If someone is ignoring you, do you actually think that pestering them is going to get you anywhere but more ignored?

By now I have my son in the car and she's moved up on my left so she can try to make eye contact. I give her the evil eye and say, "I don't have anything." I don't. I always use my debit card. Carrying cash in Oakland is like blood in the water for sharks: somehow they can smell it on you.

I get a better look at her now. She's got the puffy, whacked out look of a long term alky coming down. She backs off, up to the doors of the store and starts talking to herself. "I just want to sell you some food stamps. Shit." blah blah blah.

Oh, do I REALLY look that stupid to you? Come on. One of three scenarios or varying cominations thereof:

1) The food stamps are stolen. In which case the chances are good that they'll come up as stolen when rung up and somebody is going to jail. You'd rather it wasn't you. Well, I'd rather it wasn't me, it's not my problem, so fuck off.

2) They're counterfeit. See result of #1. Yeah, even an average person's street smarts are better than that. Thanks, but no thanks.

3) They're legitimate, and you're selling them for booze. It's illegal to buy or sell food stamps. Not only that, but I think they put something in place whereby they have to ask for ID with the food stamps and if they aren't registered to you, or you don't have your Benefits ID Card (BIC), you don't get to use them.

Listen, dumbshit, you're standing outside the supermarket, trying to sell food stamps. If they're your food stamps, and they're legitimate, then go buy food with them. Nobody in their right mind is going to say, oh, sure, I'll give you cash for possibly dodgy food stamps that you claim are yours and you should be using yourself instead of selling them.

I'm sorry, but I refuse to support anyone's drug, booze or cigarette habit, nor do I support lottery scratch card addiction. Do yourself a favor, go buy groceries with your food stamps, and go sleep it off.

The sad thing is, there is someone stupid enough to do this somewhere. I'm just glad I'm not them.

[skunk]

I'm not pissed off so far today. Woooo. Let's keep it that way.

[Yo Mama]

Give me time. I'm sure I can help. :P

[skunk]

I'm not sure you'd be able to piss me off right now. I'm completely out of it. I'm not even supposed to drive that's how fucked up I am.

[watcher]

I caught a bee to the face at a mere 95 mph today.
I swear it felt as though it broke in two pieces and one went up my nose.
It friggin hurt.

The only thing worse is riding behind a dump truck and getting sand blasted for 10 miles.
Ends rant before it becomes bitching.

[Yo Mama]

a hailstorm while riding is also very unpleasant. Thank goodness it was "small" hail.

[1972]

I found the lord today.
She was in my back pocket.
I ate her.
She gave me an upset stomach.
So that sort of pissed me off but not that much, really I guess it was my own fault for eating her in the first place, so I guess maybe I shouldn't be angry at all.

[watcher]

what did she taste like?
i'm betting pulled pork.

[1972]

what did she taste like?
i'm betting pulled pork.


Nah. More like squirrel but a bit gamey...

[DeadSoul]

HMMMMMMMMMMMM.......where do I start? Is it with my lawyer who has to appear for me tomorrow over child support bullshit that my ex brings up at the same time every year. My daughter's B-Day and X-Mas. And who, BTW, I haven't seen in 14 months as it isn't convenient for my ex apparently. We live in separate states so you can imagine the hassles. Or should I go with the not enough money for anything it seems. Or do I go with the two baby autopsies I had today because the mother's couldn't stay of the crack pipe long enough to have a kid. Now that I think about it, it is probably better for the kid. Who wants to have to grow up in that environment. Man, had a shitty fucking day all the way around. I'll be in the mortuary if anyone is looking for me.

PH out......

........4 now

[Yo Mama]

Baby autopsies. :(

[vckums]

*hugs* PH

[1972]

Actually, I have a legit bitch as to what pissed me off today:

Me.

I pissed myself off.
I can't not stop logging in to a certain place and it pisses me off.
Fucking fucktards and this stupid bullshit they spew. Outright lies and halftruths. Bad as politicians I tell you. And to try and use FACTS to correct their error? Bah!

Please help me to stop going there?
God? Anyone? Elasticman?

::sigh::

[DeadSoul]

Thanks vckums!!!

Appreciate it.

Yeah, get a lot of baby autopsies. Mostly medical related. Parents want to know why their kids are stillborn. They want to know if it was something they did or if it was a genetic thing.

Pretty sad. Makes me love my baby boy more and more each day when I come home and he runs up to me screaming...."DAAADAAAA!!!"

[vckums]

Ok 1972 you asked for it.

l]BYLMTvxOaeEl]

[Yo Mama]

I can help you in 10 words -- and I didn't even have to watch the vid! Wonder twin powers, activate! :lol:

[vckums]

We are that good chickie!! :wink:

[1972]

We are that good chickie!! :wink:

You so funny!

I watched it last night after work. If Bob hadn't been in it, I wouldn't have though. It was funny. Easier said than done but funny.

[vckums]

You should re-wtch it cause you missed the part where it is that easy. :wink:

[Boondock]

you know, i don't think anything pissed me off today.
i got my glasses and i can see now.'
i bought three more red devils for my fish tank.
my wife got home early and we spent some time cuddling

it was a good day

[1972]

you know, i don't think anything pissed me off today.
i got my glasses and i can see now.'
i bought three more red devils for my fish tank.
my wife got home early and we spent some time cuddling

it was a good day

Oh go hug a god damn tree!

[vckums]

A chick who is trying to mess with myself and hubby.

[1972]

A chick who is trying to mess with myself and hubby.

Fuck that bitch!

Hope she runs into a blue wall.

[Yo Mama]

She's a psycho. Just spreading the love around.

go away psycho. If I catch another of your IPs, I'll ban them too. Now what.

[Yo Mama]

Two things today:

1) I'm in the left lane, minding my own business, when some dork in a brand new Mercedes comes up on my right, passes me, cuts me off with about 8 inches to spare and then stops to turn left. And then he looked at me like I was crazy when I told him he was a fucking idiot.

If you are planningo on turning left, why cut off someone going through the signal? Oh, yes, entitlement. he's entitled to do whatever the hell he wants, and right of way and common courtesy be damned.

Moron.

2) Hardy Park has a kid section and a dog park section. The dog park is fenced off so that the little kids can run free. It's clearly posted that no dogs are to be off leash in the kid part of the park, and there is a leash law in the city.

So when I get to the park this morning, what do I see? No less than five medium to large dogs, running around off leash, in the kid area, not 20 yards from the gate to the dog park.

And when I say something about it, they look at ME like I'M the one out of line.

I've had a woman at that same park come up to me and say, "My dog doesn't bite, he's nice!" I. Don't. Care. I don't know you, I don't know your dog, all I know is that a dog is an animal, an animal is unpredictable, and I shouldn't have to make a decision on whether to keep my kid away from your pet or not. The leash law does not allow for exceptions. Take your dog into the part of the park designated for his use or don't come at all.

[1972]

Dontch just love people GN?

Their at FAULT but you are the rude fucker for pointing it out.
HOW DARE YOU SAY SOMETHING!!!

I will fix the dog park thing tomorrow.
Let me put on my Al Gore cape and I will fly out there for my birfday and get shit done.

[Yo Mama]

LMFAO I'd buy that for a dollar!!!

[1972]

Now, back to what pissed me off today:

THIS FUCKING PISSED ME OFF:

From The "Above" Situation:


1) Someone who's constantly posting disruptive 1-liners or off-topic posts in threads, even after being asked not to. It's not really a T&C violation, but it's a disruptive tactic.

2) Someone for whom we get an inordinate amount of member complaints, but perhaps each complaint is "borderline." This requires an unfair situation where our staff is so occupied with this particular member, the rest of the site doesn't get the appropriate attention.

3) Someone who is repeatedly posting intense ATS criticism, even after their posts have been addressed.

Direct quote from an owner.

Nice.

[Yo Mama]

Hello? Thought Police? I'd like to report a felonious use of the word "asshat" in the Chit Chat thread.

[1972]

Hello? Thought Police? I'd like to report a felonious use of the word "asshat" in the Chit Chat thread.


Though I prefer the term ass-goblin myself we could take a poll to change your name to
General Asshat!

woot woot.

[Yo Mama]

No. If I change my name at all, it will be to General Nonsense.

[1972]

You tell'em General Nuisnace is coming and hell is coming with her. Hell . . .is . . . coming . . .with . . .her!

Then I'd say, "She's no daisy, she's no daisy at all."

[Yo Mama]

I thought you didn't like stream of consciousness, oh obscure poster.

[1972]

I thought you didn't like stream of consciousness, oh obscure poster.


Everything I post is well though out.
Nothing is random.
I am just that fucking witty.
Seriously.
I fucking rock.

[Yo Mama]

That's the spirit!

[1972]

May 22, 2008:

I managed, yet again to piss myself off.
It goes back to something GN said in another thread: entitledment.
It is just another day. But my one wish every year, is that I am entitled to not have to deal with douche bags. I would like to take a moment to thank every invisible, omnipotent being ever created by man, for blessing me with the breath of live. Oh, and thank you for ruining my birfday insert everyone that I have encountered today, except here of course.

Back to life; back to reality . . .

[Yo Mama]

Uh oh, did you have a bad birthday today?

Fuckers.

I'm pissed because I got to bed about 11:15 last night and when I'd finally worked my way down into dream state, my cell phone rang. It was 12:20. Somebody asks, "Didjoo get home OK?" I was like, WTF? Who is this? He says, "marvin" in this fake sexy voice -- sounded like some kid calling his GF.

I say, no, wrong number, go to the bathroom. I had my phone in my hand because I"m half asleep, peeing, minding my own business, when the phone rings again. "Oh, do I still gots the wrong number?"

"Yeah. And since I'm trying to sleep, you may want to accept the fact that you have the wrong number programmed in your autodialler. Please stop calling."

I hung up on him as he started to argue with me.

Entitlement, again. He is NOT entitled to fucking argue with me about what a dumbshit he is in the middle of the night when I don't know him and want to go back to bed.

At least he wasn't like everyone's favorite crack head, Rhonda Bonds, who called me at 3 a.m. just to argue with me for hanging up on her the previous four times she called that night.

[1972]

Why do you talk to crackheads in the first place?
And why did you tell the guys that he had the wrong number and then tell him to go to the bathroom.

[Yo Mama]

Quit picking on my syntax.

I had no choice but to talk to the crack head. It's a long story, that spanned about a year, of this nut calling me (I have caller ID so that's how I know who it was). I finally had to pay for call blocking on my phone because the stupid freak called me at least 20 times during that year. Nobody is that stupid except a crack head.

[1972]

Not going to happen.

And you need to get out more.

Why?

Because there are a FUCK LOAD of stupid people out there.
Much more stupider(not a word) than a crack head.
I do not know how they keep from drooling all over but they are out there.

[Yo Mama]

I'm sorry, but when you take the average stupid person and add long-term crack use to the mix, you get something so far beyond stupid that the average hillbilly looks like Stephen Hawking in comparison.

No lie.

[1972]

Timmy? Tiiiiimmmmmyyyy!

http://www.southparkclub.com/pix/character/timmy.gif

[RubyRocket]

My daughter's boyfriend pissed me off today.
Stupid useless controlling motherfucking tool.
Wouldn't "allow" her to spend her brothers birthday with us, her family, because he didn't feel like associating with those of us born on the wrong side of the tracks.
FUCK YOU WITH THE SILVER SPOON YOU WERE BORN WITH IN YOUR MOUTH,UP YOUR ASS, SIDEWAYS.
Pretty boy like you would probably love it.

[GeneralStriker]

sounds like shoving it up his ass is the easiest way to get it back in his mouth anyway. do it.

[RubyRocket]

If it wouldn't break my Eww meter..I would.
Some things are too toxic to touch.
I lack full biohazard gear.

[GeneralStriker]

use a speculum and a boot. that'll fix the little bastard.

[RubyRocket]

Gonna lend me a boot?
Speculum- the most evil vile invention in the history of the world...
GREAT IDEA!

[GeneralStriker]

you operate the speculum and i'll operate the boot.

[RubyRocket]

Thanks..give me the dirty job....much obliged.
but I appreciate the tag team effort.